Scarcity of Prime Fire Lands
Oshit Ithot, CEO of the WildFireFighters of America, has explains the risk: “Most people think there are infinite forests. And there are. But not all forests are equal. Even given global warming, certain forests are particularly ideal grounds for out-of-control fires while others just don’t burn as fast or as well. The problem is that these ideal forests have been burning at an unsustainable rate. Before long, there will simply not be enough stock of prime, disease-filled and poorly-managed forests to maintain our current burn rates.”
Industry Impacts
The lack of prime fire forests could make the entire wildfire firefighting industry unsustainable. As a direct result, many firefighting jobs could be lost in the not-so-distant future. Of course, that is only the first order effect.
Mr. Ithot explains, “People fail to understand the secondary economic benefits of firefighters. Wildfire firefighting is a high-risk profession that attracts people who embrace high-risk lifestyles. As a result, firefighters do a lot to benefit local industries. Although I have no data to support this and would never suggest it applies to any particular wildfire firefighter, firefighters are major contributors to critical industries in economically fragile areas. Without us, diners, bars, police forces, hospitals, and brothels in these areas would all face major economic headwinds. And without these industries, what will remain? Recreational boating?”
While journalists prefer to remain behind the fourth wall, this also presents a challenge to journalists. Ms. Booh Gotcha, from Fear News, explains: “Few things sell like dramatic photos of fires, destroyed homes and alarmism about the impact of fire emissions. This is especially true when talking about the all-powerful and highly-desired avocado-toast demographic.”
Hope for the Future
Among all this doom and gloom, there is good news: forests do grow back. At current burn and growth rates, experts project that there will be another generation of seriously fire-prone forests just in time for the next generation of journalists and prostitutes to benefit economically.
